In Part One Covey talks a lot about the Character Ethic vs. the Personality Ethic. He believes that the Character Ethic is what will ultimately lead to success. The Personality Ethic cannot lead to success because it is "manipulative, even deceptive, encouraging people to use techniques to get other people to like them." I agree with Covey that ultimately we should strive to live by the Character Ethic, but the Personality Ethic sounds so much easier because that is what we have always known. Covey says the sayings "Smiling wins more friends than frowning" and "Your attitude determines your altitude" are both part of the Personality Ethic. While I was never told them in those exact words, I have grown up being aware of the concepts of both and I have to say I agree with those sayings and I don't think they are being fake. I mean honestly, if you are having a bad day why wouldn't you still act happy?? If you were to act the way you were feeling for instance by acting really depressed, then you're day would just be doubly depressing. But by putting on a happy face you might actually start to have a better day, and that's not being fake.
Covey describes the Personality Ethic as a type of band-aid that covers up the real problem. It is more of a solution for the short-term, rather than the long-term which is what the Character Ethic is for. This thought came up in Private Practice this week, which just happens to be my favorite show. Dr. Violet Turner, played by Amy Brenneman, finds out she is pregnant, but is nervous about becoming a single mother. Her patient helps her to realize that she does not need to be so afraid because her success as a mother does not depend on her public image, rather her strong character will help make her a wonderful mom. In this case I agree with the Character Ethic because she does not need to worry about how she will percieved in society even though she is unwed and not sure which one of her "boyfriends" is the father...can't wait for next week!
"I mean honestly, if you are having a bad day why wouldn't you still act happy??"
ReplyDeleteAnd I say to this, why would you? Problems don't get solved if they're not brought out. Not saying you should complain to everybody about every little thing, but there is no need to hide everything either. Let it out Dav. :)
In your next paragraph, you say that the Peronality Ethic is like a band-aid. Yeah, it is, and that contradicts what you said above.
Be real. Love you Dav.